Thursday, November 24, 2005

Oui FM - Thursday 1pm

Okay, so before I get started I'd just like to let you know that I've just discovered another reason for all you Fox News types to hate France: their computer keyboards are fro, so,e crazy bizarro world where the "a" and "q" are switched, the "m" and comma are switched, and all the nu,bers are only accessible by the shift key since non-shifted they provide space for all that ridiculous French stuff like "è" and "é" and "ç": I'm forced to type about 1/2 speed and there will probably be a lot of rqndo, typow: Iù, sorry:
 
So, yes. After 8 hours of confinement at Heathrow; we were finally released on good behavior at 2:30 pm. BMI greeted us by playing Air's "Kelley Watch the Stars" on the PA which I took as a good sign, and soon enough we emerged from customs at the yesterday's Tomorrowland of the Charles de Gaulle airport to find DJ Zebra, TV crew and son in tow; holding a sign that said "ZUT ALORS." I think he might have been making fun of me.
 
We braved the Paris rush hour traffic and made it to Zebra's pad in the Neuilly neighborhood of Paris, which he maintains is the Beverly Hills of France but I have yet to see Shannon Doherty anywhere. He went to the grocery store to pick up some food, and when he got back said "Guess what I heard in the grocery store? Radio Maximum playing your 'Boulevard of Broken Songs." We were to hear it two more times just last night on the radio.
 
Adam Freeland and Evil 9 were playing but soon enough a hallucinatory exhaustion set in and even simple activities like standing became exercises in stamina. We had been awake over 24 hours at that point (and slept maybe 3 hours the night before).  (By the way, I'd just like to take a moment to point out that on this keyboard, the open parenthesis is like 7 keys away from the closed, below the 5 and next to the 0: No wonder people riot.) Anyway Adrian & D left for DJ Comar's pad in the St. Germain neighborhood; and I fell onto Zebra's couch and into a 10 hour blackout. But, hey: Now I don't have any jet lag.
 
This morning we came to Oui FM, and of course it turns out I'm completely off about the interview schedule: the Spoutnik show which I did an interview for was at noon today, and recorded for playback from 10 to midnight on Saturday night -- so if you'd like to hear me, you can tune in to www.ouifm.fr around 11pm (2pm SF / 4pm Central). But I wouldn't recommend it. My pathetic attempts at brushing up on my French completely failed and I was unable to understand any of the DJ's questions, and even when he kindly translated for me, I couldn't answer in French. I think I might have made one joke -- when they were talking about Dean Gray I said "Qui est-ce??!" in a shocked voice which got a polite laugh. They played Novocaine Rhapsody (apparently poised to become another hit for me on Oui FM) and the Coldplay Kraftwerk thing.
 
Tonight, I'm live on the air on France Inter, so I better write down some useful phrases. Now, we're off to see if Mysterious D is feeling better -- she woke up feeling a bit iffy, but I know Adrian was determined to get to the top of the Eiffel Tower. We'll see.
 
Oh: and the baked goods, my God, the baked goods!!! Perhaps I can forgive them their retarted keyboard.


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